So let me tell you what I'm not excited about: going on a 24 mile bike ride today. When Robbie told me a couple of days ago that he and a friend had decided to have "us couples" go on a ride together, I wasn't too alarmed. Bike rides are fun. Not my first choice of recreation, but it's not bad. Interestingly enough my favorite outdoor activity is hiking (which is actually more strenuous on the body than riding a bike--go figure). Last Sunday I did a 4 mile river hike with our dog Belle while Robbie participated in a demo on mountain bikes.
So I asked him, "How long is the ride?"
Robbie's response was a coy, "It is 12 miles..."
"Oh that's not too terribly bad, just go easy on me..." says me.
"12 miles there and back..." Robbie mumbles.
"24 miles!!! Are you kidding me??!! Sunday is supposed to be a day of rest!!" I proclaim and further my protest.
Now I need to clarify that I like to ride bikes--except with my husband.
I know that sounds mean, but it is the truth. Let me plead my case: my husband is a cyclist who works in a bike shop. It is a double whammy. Not only is he super fast as a rider, he has a super nice bike that makes it easy for him to ride even faster. Meanwhile I am left in the dust, or feeling guilty that he is literally riding circles around me waiting for me to catch up. Although I must say, like a loving husband he never complains about it, and is all too happy that I'm out there riding with him.
This reminds me of some more tell-tale signs of being married to a cyclist:
-you do everything in your power to prevent your spouse from seeing the bike section of a giant retailer (especially if they work in a bike shop) because they complain about how the bikes are built terribly, and the money should go to a local shop. This wouldn't be so terrible except that this adds an extra 30 minutes to the shopping trip.
-they slow down when they see a cyclist on the road NOT because they are afraid of hitting them (see the next sign), but they want to see what bike/bike components they are riding.
-they yell and scream at other drivers for swerving a ridiculous distance in an attempt to avoid a cyclist on the road. (this annoys me too!!) Listen people: it is illegal for cyclists to ride on the sidewalk (not to mention very dangerous due to the uneven pavement and other pedestrians). You do not have to drive in the other lane to go around a cyclist, and further increase the chance of an accident. Slightly move to the left of the lane and feel guilty that you are not as cool as the cyclist. The cyclist is used to riding on the road with cars, they are not going to make any sudden moves. (like the automobile drivers around them)
Conclusion: you are more likely to scare the cyclist if you swerve to avoid him. Slow down a bit (you are probably doing 10 over the speed limit anyway) and move to the left of the lane. No big deal. Now go ride a bike!
-their bike costs more than their car.
-your dishwasher and/or refrigerator is filled with squeeze water bottles.
-they measure everything in grams, not pounds.
-their thighs are bigger than yours.
-they aren't ashamed to wear shammy shorts in public (and by now you aren't embarrassed to be seen with them).
-they like the sound of cowbells.
-they know who Christian Vande Velde is.
-bull horns are not on an animal.
-they avoid the Katy Trail like the plague.
-they have tan lines that would make Hank Hill feel better about himself.
-they have to buy more shaving cream than you do.
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