Sorry for an eternity between posts. Life has been busy, which can be a good thing! I am working 2 (sometimes 3) jobs now, so free time as it once was, is now gone. I work at a retail clothing store part-time (really just for the discount on clothes!) and my other part-time job that I absolutely love is teaching in a before and after school program. When I can fit it in, I also substitute teach.
Life still isn't the same as last year at this time. And honestly, I still don't know if that is a good thing or not. Last year at this time I had a regular full-time job in addition to Robbie's full time job. We had steady income, and more importantly, insurance. Robbie has already missed a check-up on his routine post-cancer schedule. We just can't afford it. Without insurance, it is $5000 per CT scan. Not to mention the doctor's fees and blood work.
Whenever I get discouraged about our money situation or insurance dilemma, I have to remind myself that God always provides. He has before, and He always will. How He provides can change, and it takes everything within me to trust that. Last year He provided through our steady income, and this year He has been providing through unsteady income. Never-the-less, we still have our home and food on the table. Robbie and I are still healthy. Robbie has no signs or symptoms of his cancer returning. He has been cancer free for over a year. It isn't even a forefront thought in our minds anymore.
I'm not going to lie and say that I have been completely okay about our situation. I get pretty discouraged and distressed actually. Sometimes the guilt and worry can be everything but all-consuming. But at the same time, it does grow and strengthen my relationship with God and others.
I have been at the peak of both points. The highest point of having steady income, and the lowest point of having no income. And I can say that Jesus is the same yesterday, today, and forever. However life is at the time, He never changes and will never leave you.
1 comment:
It is an inconsistent world, but as you kind of refer to at the end of your writing, He never changes and will never leave you. Meaning; if you are a believer, you are of His world, which is a consistent, very consistent world. So don't think of it as this worlds ups and downs, but as His world that is playing out His plan for you. Embrace it with the love you have for Him...
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